6.20.2012

next chapter

I'm currently going through an extremely calm meltdown.

On Sunday, Matt broke up with me.  I was, and am, devastated.  The person who I thought was my person is not my person anymore.  Thank Jebus that my dear roommate was home to pull me out of complete darkness.  After crying for a few hours I moved on to the angry stage where I felt very productive and desperately wanted to figure out my current, complicated living situation and move on with my life.

So, that same day I went to look at an apartment in Brooklyn (5 stops further on the same train) with Sean.  Upon entering the apt I wasn't super amazed since my current apartment is much more put together.  However, when I went into the bedroom I felt a certain sense of calm.  The room will fit my things perfectly and there's a CLOSET!!!!  For those who don't know, this is a functional, usually enclosed area where one stores their belongings such as clothing.  I haven't had a closet for the last 2 years and I can't wait to have one again.  The room has a huge front window which is super sunny which is great and it's on the FIRST FLOOR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  No more 6th floor walk up!  Yippee!  I really don't want to move but once it happens I think I'll feel better about everything.  Plus, my future roommates are super sweet.  I hugged them after I looked at the place and told them that Sangria and I wanted to live there for sure.  Countdown.  12 days.

As sad as I am, I have always been a firm believer in things happening for a reason.  Matt and I aren't meant to be right now and in my heart I know that.  Matt and I have been dating on and off/good friends for 10 years.  That's not something that I would ever throw away.  No matter what, Matt and I will always be friends and I am comforted knowing that.    

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